…but I don’t see a wheelchair

1eb0f6a43ef2df98cb765a9d1ac18cbcThe vast majority of us are the same, we can’t help it, it’s in our DNA, and we don’t know we do it, but we do. We pre-judge. I am registered disabled, and just 20 minutes ago I drove to the shop, parked in a disabled space, and an old couple questioned why I was parked there.

So instead of getting all angry, I had to explain to this couple, in their say, late 60s that just because you can’t see the disability, does not mean it is not there, in the end I got an apology, not that I wanted or needed one, and off they went, I guess ashamed of themselves

We live in a world where people look first and ask later. The funny thing is, not an hour ago I had this exact same conversation with a friend, who is also disabled. No wheelchair, no limbs missing, just in pain. I think the world needs to educate itself on disabled people. Just because someone does not look disabled, how can you or anyone judge the quality of that person’s life?

I personally have walked away from many family and friends, not because I wanted to, but because I am embarrassed. Pride kicks in and you don’t want anyone to see you in pain. This is not really a decision I made, it just happened over time, I slowly just walked away from people I love and like. Don’t ask me why, as I don’t know.  The people in my house understand, these are the only people that need to

The pain, the depression and all the other things that go with being “Like me” are not nice. But any part of Shaun that still remains, I will be me, not be ashamed and live my life the best I can. I know many disabled people read this blog, and I know many will relate to what I am saying.

I just wish others, who take having no pain for granted, would relate to it also. I don’t want sympathy; I don’t want felt sorry for. Understood would be a start. As people judge people like me. And all I really ask is know the person before you judge the person. Many in my life know I am in 24/7 pain, but not many do. Some care, some don’t, some make an effort, and some don’t, maybe some are ashamed to know someone disabled, I have no idea, maybe a just a bad guess on my behalf, but this shows I also can be wrong, if indeed I am

Just see things for what they are in life. And define what suffering is, you will struggle. For me life is hard enough without having to explain it away to a stranger, never mind someone I know

Shaun

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