Finally in the ‘Mental Health’ System – LONG, HARD, ROAD AHEAD – I SEE HOPE!

Living with severe pain and severe mental health issues. My first blog for a while here, and I didn’t really want to do it either, but as we reach out, others reach back. It started for me, the journey of pain and mental health about 15 years ago. I had issues from Childhood that haunted me when I was signed off from being allowed to Work all these years ago. The cycle of pain and mental health is a tricky one. The medications I am now on are less, but better and just as powerful. Today I am TRYING to start being a sit-down DJ again through the Stafford Center below and also singing lessons to FINALLY TRY and sit on a stage and create moment of ‘Music’. Always I have this view that Sport, Politics, Religion, and the worse one, MONEY just divide us all, well most of us. For me, just me, Music is my God, it speaks to me, and it listens back. I need a stage, I need to be part of something for myself. I spent too long doing things for others. I lost most of my Family because of these issues, but Family who mock, don’t understand, make things worse, are they worth having? For me no, but we all have our own ways. What I do know is, when we get ill in ANY way and it effects us badly, people walk away. FAMILY say things like “I am not getting involved”, but who am I to talk, I walked away from the emotion of HATE I had and still do have. Family just unable to hear us speak and just say ‘Nice one’ then change the subject. I am fighting for myself this time. I have lost, BUT SO HAVE YOU. We ALL have a something, we all have things holding us back, making us dread moving forward. We all lose, we all hurt, we are all just human. We live in a selfish money chasing brainwashed World. So I am doing this for me, but I have two little Girls here, my Daughters. All I am trying to do is make sure they are like their brothers, I hope they grow up and find HAPPY, without money, hate, anger, struggle. And understand who they want in their lives as they grow. They are only 7 and 8 years old, but my Job is to gently and over time tell them ‘It is your life, you make the choices, and to NEVER allow another to dictate to them in any way possible’, it really is that simple. Like you I am surrounded by people not in control, and these people work, have money, CHOOSE the life they lead, and are owned by emotions and the emotions of others. I dislike these people because of the impact they have on my Girls. Never hate, I say it below always. Just typing to TRY and connect. This took me like 3 hours today 😀 I hope 2 people read it.

BE KIND TO YOURSELF!

DON’T ALLOW OTHERS TO STEAL YOUR LIFE, THOUGHTS OR EMOTIONS.

Be yourself and NEVER compromise this. When you do, you give your control to others.

For now…

..Below is the system of help I am in just now. I will be adding a pain-team back to this list shortly

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This was my first HELP about 12 years ago:

@Dr_A_Dobbin – On Twitter

https://www.facebook.com/PositiveMentalTraining/

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The River Center is for people suicidal, depressed, just lost in life:

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I am now here. The possibility to be a DJ again, AND TO SING (Is the plan)

https://www.facebook.com/TheStaffordCentre

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BLOGGERS FOR PEACE AND SANITY

THIS DOES NOT REPRESENT ALL DISABLED PEOPLE

THIS DOES NOT REPRESENT ALL DISABLED PEOPLE

Shaun Gibson Twitter: @ShaunyScot
Skype Username: shaunyg1973
Shaun Celtic FC Twitter: @ShaunyCeltic

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For ‘Everyone who is Sad, Alone, Depressed, Stuck in Darkness – YOU ARE NOT ALONE

The Most basic human emotions

Being stuck with negative emotion after a loss in life can change us, being stuck in the darkness of sadness when our life changes for the worst can and will change the strongest of us. I would never sit here or anywhere and claim to know the truth or say I understand how your sadness, or any emotion can be stopped. Right now I personally am in a personal Hell. I don’t write for me because I can openly talk to the right people. It is hard to talk, and it’s not something I enjoy, but I have to fight, like you I have reasons and people to fight for. You are not the only one hurting or sad, depressed or nearing the end of your patience with life, far from it! This is a Taboo subject that not many people can open up about, and this is totally understandable and allowed.

 

Some leave clues to sadness and pain, if we look and listen, we can be helped

Recently, through NHS neglect I have found myself opened up to pain and emotions I have not felt for a long time. Like you I was once happy, living, caring, social, I could go out into the World and join in. When I say NHS neglect I must pull that emotion back and say it’s just human error. People put us on Drugs, we become addicted, and then they take us off them and leave us in utter HELL because our body is craving the drug. I must now turn the coin around and say ‘Alcohol and Drugs’ are not the answer. Drs put me on about 12 different drugs over the last Decade and a half, and today I am happy to try and understand why I have to let these drugs leave my system, but it’s the hardest thing I have ever done, but like you maybe, I need put on Drugs that HELP, Drs may have already killed me. I must say if it wasn’t for FELLOW SUFFERERS I may have given in already. I am told ‘There is a light at the end of the tunnel of pain’ – I can’t yet even see the tunnel, let alone the light. Today I am suffering, but those closest to me, and I mean as close as could be, are suffering worse, because I CHOOSE to trust a Drs advice on ‘Smothering it all with prescribed drugs’ – I have 2 little girls in this house and this is hidden from them, think Daddy has a sore knee, but they are 7 and 8 years old, I know it will break their heart when we have to tell them all about life THEY ARE THE REASON I am typing this at around 4am on a freezing cold Scottish night. Already I have been here an hour, but slowly I am getting the words out somehow. Yesterday (Wednesday) my body went into sever withdrawal and a few organs started to close down. But I made it through another day. I want to RIGHT NOW take my own life to make life better for those I love or call friend. But my Daughters need me, so I can’t be selfish; I have to ‘Man up’ and become strength. The first people I hope to see this strength are my Daughters and their Mother. I can only try, all I can write in this moment is ‘I am trying’ – I walked away from almost everyone I used to love being around, I chase people away because I an angry, but its ok, sometimes we should and can be angry. As I said above, others leave us clues. I hope you can find your way to cope. This isn’t mine, but I am reaching out in the hope the RIGHT PEOPLE read and reach back. The song below starts around 40 seconds in, they lyrics are too much for some, but some of us can live with this music. The proof of this is, it’s a video. It isn’t fair, it hurts and it’s ok to not be ok.

 

 

 

 

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THIS DOES NOT REPRESENT ALL DISABLED PEOPLE

THIS DOES NOT REPRESENT ALL DISABLED PEOPLE

Shaun Gibson Twitter: @ShaunyScot
Skype Username: shaunyg1973
Shaun Celtic FC Twitter: @ShaunyCeltic

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♫ Battle Symphony ♫

Another Linkin Park song and this one has lyrics that we will all define in a different way. For me these lyrics are saying “I use Music to battle” whatever that battle is. We ALL have a battle going on, we all find coping mechanisms to help us fight our battles. For me it’s always Music. My family and close friends are a given in terms of ‘They are my first thought” but outside that Music is the saviour of my soul and mind. I find getting lost in a song, the lyrics, the beat; we can own it and play it till it gets stuck in our minds for days and days, even forever. I had one of my sons visit me during the week and his Wife, an amazing woman joked about my son “He plays the same song for days on end” 😀 But this is something my own partner says about me. It is a running joke, just fun that some of us use Music to heal ourselves. Just find the right lyrics or right words and it can make us turn to something else. As I always say, when we lost #Anger #Hate and #Fear, we become something else. But it ain’t easy, to try and lose these 3 emotions is a battle. Being #Anger is easy, being #Hate is easy, being #Fear is Human. Being the opposite of these 3 emotions takes hard work as the basic human instinct is to hate, to be angry and to be fearful. I have been anger, I have been hate and I am often fearful still. But all I can do, same as you, is try. All anyone can do it try, maybe not for ourselves, but we must find reason, even when there is no reason. Again, just my own thoughts.Thought I can have and own from time to time. Written by someone who loves me and helps me every day of her life FOR FREE. I did not promise her this life, but I do what I can.

I worry more for others than myself. We live in a World where GREED has poisoned the souls of the people in charge, and those of you who can read this MIGHT think your life is awful, trust me it could be worse! You could be in Syria, Iraq or worse Yemen where Genocide happens daily with the use of bombs and bullets paid for with money that COULD build hospitals, hire Dr’s, help the poor and in need. I know many people don’t help themselves but FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, some people just get thrown a life and it’s hard. Yet the people I voted for don’t have full control. I am helped and I am thankful, but I look to other Countries and my 1st thought when I am allowed to own a thought is “OH HOW LUCKY WE ARE HERE”, wherever Democracy allegedly exists. Yeah, like Spain? Yeah Democracy right?, right?

My own father tells me always “I cry for humanity” and now I am an adult with kids and a life I did not offer to those around me, I see it too. If only our Politicians were not so scared easy to DO BETTER. Money has ruined us all. A clean slate is needed. In the meantime, find God, find whatever gets you through your hell, even if you don’t think you are in or going to hell. The World will judge YOU anyway and our Future will look at our leaders today and say “WHY DID THEY KILL THIS WORLD” Damn us all for allowing our World to have to BATTLE to breath!! In the very sense of the Word. Our Future will spit in our graves and I don’t blame them 😦

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Battle Symphony (Official Lyric Video) – Linkin Park
Via: Linkin Park on YouTube

 

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THIS DOES NOT REPRESENT ALL DISABLED PEOPLE

THIS DOES NOT REPRESENT ALL DISABLED PEOPLE

Shaun Gibson Twitter: @ShaunyScot
Skype Username: shaunyg1973
Shaun Celtic FC Twitter: @ShaunyCeltic

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The Broken Family Unit – It’s a Global Selfish Uncaring World!! God is Money!

Lately as I wake up to an uncaring World torn between what they desire and what they think they want, and also the lust for Money everywhere is very hurtful to stand back and watch. I remember when I was a child in the 1980’s, Family was close, if one fell, we all fell, then helped each other back up. Today the ‘Family Unit’ is broken and all I can see is Money and Ego getting in the way. My Father is in his early 70’s and lives on a small Island somewhere; he has Dementia and NOBODY CARES, NOBODY GIVES A SHIT ABOUT HIM. It seems I am the ONLY person who keeps in touch with my Father, he has NOBODY really, he is alone with his thoughts and I have no idea being 700 miles away and unable to travel to him for ‘Many’ reasons, how bad things are for him, and everyone else is just caring about the people they stayed close too, like siblings, MY OWN, who turned away to the other side of whatever family. Jesus, the more I think about it, can I blame them? Pause for thought Shaun!

Me and my Nana in 1973

I remember when my Dads Mother, my Nana passed away, she died alone and unhappy. Often I think back to her, the top of my Family Tree and cry. I cry because ‘SOMETHING’ made people walk away from her, in the end she died alone and thinking nobody cared. I took ALL the blame because I was a bad kid, but I still tried, as I did along with one Aunt who sadly passed too were the ONLY PEOPLE to try. I visited most nights to make sure my Nana was in bed ok, the gas was turned off and she was safe. This was back in the 1990’s. I remember the wake after the funeral, the guilt I felt was self inflicted. My Aunt who has sadly passed away was there and came to me. She gave me a hug and said “Penny for your thoughts” I then told her what was on my mind, my Aunt cried a little and said words that helped, and I will never forget her for that and many reasons.

Edinburgh, Scotland – My Home

20 years on and my Family on BOTH SIDES is broken, I don’t see my own Sons any-more as ‘THEY DON’T WANT TO GET INVOLVED’ But involved in what? Life? Family? Love? Yeah it’s a confusing emotion. My own Mother is in a bad place and it’s SO HARD as I have NO IDEA how bad things are for her, not a clue, nobody speaks, nobody seems to give 2 fucks any more. It’s all ‘Me, Me, Me’ wherever I go, the IRONY of it all is wherever I go it’s all about ‘SHAUN’, and this is from people I have never seen in 20 years or seen in the passing a few times over the time we had two sons I am so proud off along with their Mother and now 2 little girls that literally keep me alive. But looking back I look back and smile, Edinburgh is my home, I want to leave the mess behind, but Edinburgh taught me all I know. Life just happens but Family from Childhood all moved away from Edinburgh, often I ask myself “IS EDINBURGH SO BAD” I don’t think so, it’s a beautiful place

[MUSIC VIDEO] The Lake Poets ‘EDINBURGH’
Via: The Lake Poets on YouTube

Memories

I see a World so uncaring, so Money oriented, so scared of ‘EMOTION’ it hurts, afraid to ‘Talk deeply’ even one time and move away from it. I have never left my Childhood in the sense I am still living my life around the same people and same area of Edinburgh, Scotland. But the Family unit IS BROKEN wherever I look, anywhere I look, most if not all families just DON’T CARE, and the ones who do care are selective on WHAT SIDE OF FAMILY THEY CARE FOR, sadly many chase the money and side-step people who are ill. It’s horrible to watch. Again I am ‘Irony’ I know it! But like many I get blamed always, so I may as well be irony and just take blame right?

I have two little girls here aged 8 and 7 years old; they are starting to take note of NO FAMILY. They don’t know why, I MUST take some blame as I do have a car but LIFE JUST SAYS I CAN’T DRIVE SOMETIMES. My partner does her VERY BEST to show my Girls life, but it’s ALMOST IMPOSSIBLE to sit with Family in all directions be them blood or not these days. People just hate, fear and loath over money or emotions life somehow forgot to teach a generation of people. Where did we go wrong globally, can you see it, do you even care? I know I do, but it’s like trying to fart against a storm to stop if. Yeah Scottish humor right there, got to keep smiling yeah?

What happened to us?

What happened to us all? What happened to you? What happened to me? What happened to us? Will you read this and ACCEPT BLAME? Because these days all I get from these kinds of people is ‘IT’S NOT MY FAULT’, YEAH! People just TAKE THE BLAME. I am a Grandfather in name only; I don’t see my Grandchildren and I am at the stage of giving up on EVERYONE. HOW FUCKING SAD IS THAT? And THEY will read this and just accept and not try to make up. I get it, sadly I understanding it. The worst decision I ever made was to wake up to this World, it’s IN DIRE TROUBLE

Right now if I could I would sell up, get a passport and take my Girls to Australia where I have some family who still ACTUALLY CARE. Recently I had 2 Cousins who flew from Australia to Scotland to spread ashes for a parent they lost and ONLY around 12 people or so showed up from the Scottish side of my Dads side of the Family, a family that is FUCKED. I am irony because I was not there myself, but I respected them by not going as certain people just want to get drunk and cause FIGHTS because they think ‘Being a Tough Person’ suits their style. I was one from 20 people who stayed away TO RESPECT my Australian family, I am not alone, about 10% of the Family turned up for them, Australia to Scotland and THIS!

[NOW HEAR ME OUT FFS] I was on HEROIN Levels of Drugs till a year or so ago till a voice in my head said “Tell the Dr you want out” and my Dr was amazing and changed medication allowing me to wake up JUST ENOUGH to see two little girls beside me, but also others who just ARE NOT INTERESTED in anyone bar themselves, I respect private people, I must respect hate, anger and fear in others because like you, do we have a choice? My pain is no worse nor no less than yours, my issues one and the same as you who read this. Put aside health and money for a moment and I see it, my friends see it, Family I do speak to feel like I do. It’s hurtful and awful.

I can almost remember this, I was always youngest

But Family members of mine will read this and see HATE, ANGER OR FEAR. The 3 emotions one of my Parents pressed me HARD to lose from my mind over many years. Always one of my parents was telling me “Shaun, hate anger and fear will drag you to the grave”!! So I listened and now all I do is hurt. I woke up to a level of dysfunction so badly I just want to smother the pain in drugs and say ‘Not interested’, this morning I TRIED TO REACH OUT TO A BROTHER AND A SISTER due to a worry I have for one of my Parents and I got NOTHING BUT ‘SHIT THROWN BACK IN MY FACE”, same old bullshit like “Aww Shaun!! People get old and it’s JUST LIFE” << WHAT ON EARTH HAS HAPPENED TO US ALL? I am close enough with many people still who hurt people with lack of caring people and it’s so hard to see. I have my life partner here HURTING daily because of lack of love from her OWN! You can’t deny this if you read, BUT YOU HAVE CHOICE TO FIX IT, and we are here should you decide to ‘GET INVOVLED’ in love of Family

I see 1 option for my Daughters, and it’s a new life, new ways, somewhere where people care. My only doubt and question is “DOES IT EXIST?” I fear it does not. But as long as I have air in my lungs and a mind to try hard, I will protect my Daughter from Hate, Anger and Fear like many friends and family and I who have young kids agree on “WE WILL NOT ALLOW OUR KIDS TO GROW UP AND BECOME SELFISH AND UNCARING PEOPLE” And I refuse to do this with my Daughters, AT ANY COST! Even if it hurts me to walk away totally.

I wish I felt the emotion to this picture….1975 I think

WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO THIS WORLD? I remember a Family so close on all sides, then I seen Drink and Drugs, abuse, hatred and more and people just slowly did what I IRONICALLY AM SAYING HERE…They just walked away! The old saying of “If you can’t beat them, join them” seems my only option for my Daughters. This rant, as it will be called a rant! if anything, it’s just a confused question of ‘HOW AND WHY’ can I help two little girls see love and happiness? I will do my best to search for answers for MY 2 DAUGHTERS!!! I must therefore be like the rest and turn around, walk away and say “I love you, but I must look after my own”

THE IRONY OF IT ALL IS KILLING ME! I am fucking BADLY disabled, my body lives in pain and my mind is FUCKED. Yet I feel I am the only person looking at our kids, all our kids, globally and thinking “HOW CAN I MAKE IT BETTER” – But then I pause, reflect, and KNOW there are people like me who want to mend the ‘Broken Family Unit’. How we sit back and allow each other to hurt and die alone, how we allow our minds to be turned by actions of perversion be them literal or fiscal is beyond my thoughts.

….I am lost, but I must find a way for 2 little girls. AT ANY AND ALL COST. No longer will I allow myself to be #Anger #Fear or #Hate, I purged my soul of these 3 deadly emotions. Sadly most people I see have not, most have 1 or 2 or all 3 emotions of Anger, fear and hate. Why?

It was ACTUALLY fun before….. lol – That is me crying North-West Scotland as my Sibling laughs 😀 Good times!!

Whoever reads this, and I only get about 300/500 reads per day these days [NOT THAT NUMBERS MATTER, I would rather 50 REAL people read it than 1,000 uncaring people read this, I am asking why has our World walked away from itself and to what? Money the illusion of happiness through the illusion of money?  But then I know people reading this will just point the finger back at me and my kind, and allow the circle of #Anger #Hate and #Fear to be in their very minds and souls, and transmit it to their own. So I MUST protect my girls from these emotions, so they grow to be free from these emotions. IF IT’S MY LAST ACT AS A HUMAN, THEN SO BE IT, I ACCEPT THE CHALLENGE WITH LOVE AND A SMILE.

 

When in Rome……..You know the rest surely! We give up on each other too easily. Why?

#Peace

I miss them all…All I knew!

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BLOGGERS FOR PEACE AND SANITY

THIS DOES NOT REPRESENT ALL DISABLED PEOPLE

THIS DOES NOT REPRESENT ALL DISABLED PEOPLE

Shaun Gibson Twitter: @ShaunyScot
Skype Username: shaunyg1973
Shaun Celtic FC Twitter: @ShaunyCeltic

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Celebrate the life of Chester Bennington on YouTube. Friday 27th October #LinkinPark #FuckDepression

Linkin Park’s Chester Bennington tribute at the Hollywood Bowl will be live-streamed on YouTube this Friday, October 27. According to Billboard, the Linkin Park & Friends Celebrate Life in Honor of Chester Bennington concert will stream online at 7:45 p.m. PT. Early afternoon UK time, late evening for anyone in Australia, look out your own regions GMT and get the time right if you care to watch what will be an emotional night remembering a man who fought his demons, wrote about them and sang them to the World. He may be gone but but his Music is forever. Saying goodbye is choice, I say never say goodbye

The show will mark the first time the band has performed since Bennington’s suicide on July 20. Other acts set to perform include Blink-182, Bring Me The Horizon, Machine Gun Kelly, and Jonathan Davis from Korn.In addition to the tribute show, Linkin Park’s surviving members recently established the One More Light Fund in honor of Bennington as an off-shoot of the Music For Relief organization. Co-founded by Bennington, the nonprofit organization helps provide relief for survivors of natural disasters.

Via: https://johnjayandrich.iheart.com/

Linkin Park YouTube Channel: Linkin Park

[VIDEO] ♫ One More Light ♪ A Song for people tryingto beat sadness
Via Shaun Gibson on YouTube

Chester’s Wife Talinda (Twitter name: @TalindaB ) Tweet Below, is very strong in her message for #FuckDepression. My own natural thoughts as a fellow sufferer, as my Family do too is ‘Why do we say Rest In Peace’ after Death? And not say things like ‘Live in Peace’ when alive? – Why do we leave it too late, why don’t we notice the signs and help more before someome leaves us or ‘The light goes out’ on life? 😦 We must shove the Taboo nature of Suicide to one side and understand for MILLIONS of people it is a living emotion that lasts every waking moment. For many of us going to sleep at night or any time of the day is a quick release, waking up can be the moment we say ‘Enough’ – I can only promise my loved ones ‘I am trying’ alone, to beat Suicide and say #FuckDepression!

#ForChester
#ForEveryone
#ForEarth
#ForAnyoneWithAHeart

**

Some Tweets from around the World:

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THIS DOES NOT REPRESENT ALL DISABLED PEOPLE

THIS DOES NOT REPRESENT ALL DISABLED PEOPLE

Shaun Gibson Twitter: @ShaunyScot
Skype Username: shaunyg1973
Shaun Celtic FC Twitter: @ShaunyCeltic

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♫ One More Light ♫ A Song for people trying to see the World – Imagine

🙏👉🌍🌏🌎👀👈✌️

When we sit down and don’t speak because we may worry what others may think, we oppress ourselves and each other. When we stand up and speak, we liberate ourselves and those around us. Before we can see the World and understand the World around us, first we must understand ourselves, accept ourselves and learn to like ourselves. Only then can we turn and look at the World without the basic human emotions that cloud our every thought, day and impulse. These 3 emotions are #HATE #ANGER and #FEAR. Once we remove, if we can remove these emotions, then life becomes something else, we become something else. Self importance dissipates and we see the World, we hear the World, we become less selfish and more caring towards first our own lives and Worlds, then the actual World itself. Selfish people doing selfish things for selfish gain will in the end be alone, those who decide to reach out are never alone. Down the right-hand side of my blog are video’s, each a video I seen that gave me power of my own thoughts. The video that hit me most is the Charlie Chaplin great dictator speech, it is Words spoken in 1940 when our World was at War, but the Words ring true today, the images speak of the selfish acts that many of us can feel. Some feel, some can’t. We must respect this because to be free is to allow freedom of others, as long as no harm is being done, sadly much harm is happening Globally as I type, as you read. People are in Genocide being killed for Selfish reasons, yet only a few of us care. If each day every living soul awoke with one purpose, example of purpose would be ‘To make one person smile’ Imagine we ALL did this, we could change the World over-night. The very thing many of us crave is in sight, but the blind are blinded by consumption of selfish acts by selfish perverted people. We must stand up, we must unite. I know I am not alone, and neither are you. Will you look only at yourself or will you look at the World and care? I grew up with an elder telling me “I cry for Humanity”, so my Childhood till today has been a journey of discovery of self, my World and yours. Education is simple if we know it exists outside our own front door or even our own minds. Life is hard, yet many make it harder, so logic tells us life can be easier. Living in the moment meant this moment only, moments of self reflection come and go for me personally, what about you?

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THIS DOES NOT REPRESENT ALL DISABLED PEOPLE

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Shaun Gibson Twitter: @ShaunyScot
Skype Username: shaunyg1973
Shaun Celtic FC Twitter: @ShaunyCeltic

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♫ For anyone with Mental Health issues ♫

Images and Lyrics. For anyone with Mental Health issues – Chester Bennington – Numb – I myself suffer from Suicidal thoughts and a ton more. But I don’t suffer in silence nor alone. I talk, I speak up, and I have MANY good friends who are like me. Policemen, Trades Workers, Teachers, Sports Coaches, pretty much EVERY level of Society there are people I know who have a daily thought of Suicide. Many call it depression, for me it’s just darkness, sadness.

For anyone with Mental Health issues – Chester Bennington – Numb
Via:  Shaun Gibson on You Tube

NEVER SADNESS FOR ME in-terms of ‘Shaun’, my sadness is for our World. Sadness for the World around me, sadness for the entire World. But when I say this, I know, we all know, many don’t believe us. They think we want sympathy, feeling sorry for us. Not what we want, we just want to talk about together so we don’t lay it on loved ones. Life CAN be that easy, why some resist the easy and make it harder still, is beyond my thoughts. Never in hate…Always in peace and love. Shaun

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THIS DOES NOT REPRESENT ALL DISABLED PEOPLE

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Shaun Gibson Twitter: @ShaunyScot
Skype Username: shaunyg1973
Shaun Celtic FC Twitter: @ShaunyCeltic

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♫ One More Light ♫ Linkin Park ♫

This song is just EPIC, the lyrics are what Chester Bennington was telling the World, his Suicide was a shock, a surprise, but only now do we understand Chester was singing his way out. I recently told my Family and loved ones I live with Suicide myself, very hard to come out of that closet, but we must not treat Suicide as a secret nor a Taboo subject. It is a living breathing emotion people deal with on a daily basis. Like I always say ‘Regret is ONLY regret when we allow it to be regret’ As a species we MUST notice each other more, or we live in regret for life. “Who cares when 1 more light goes out” is a lyric, this song speaks to souls. Some will hear morbid, some will hear hope, sadness, but that is Music right? We all hear different things. #SuicideMustHaveAVoice #MusicIsSoulFood

~~~

One More Light (Official Video) – Linkin Park
Via Linkin Park on You Tube

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Lyrics

[Verse 1]
Should’ve stayed, were there signs, I ignored?
Can I help you, not to hurt, anymore?

We saw brilliance, when the world, was asleep
There are things that we can have, but can’t keep

[Chorus]
If they say
Who cares if one more light goes out?
In the sky of a million stars
It flickers, flickers
Who cares when someone’s time runs out?
If a moment is all we are
Or quicker, quicker
Who cares if one more light goes out?
Well I do

[Verse 2 ]
The reminders, pull the floor from your feet
In the kitchen, one more chair than you need, oh

And you’re angry, and you should be, it’s not fair
Just ’cause you can’t see it, doesn’t mean it, isn’t there

[Chorus]
If they say
Who cares if one more light goes out?
In the sky of a million stars
It flickers, flickers
Who cares when someone’s time runs out?
If a moment is all we are
Or quicker, quicker
Who cares if one more light goes out?
Well I do

[Instrumental + Bridge]
(I do)

[Chorus/Outro]
Who cares if one more light goes out?
In the sky of a million stars
It flickers, flickers
Who cares when someone’s time runs out?
If a moment is all we are
Or quicker, quicker

Who cares if one more light goes out?
Well I do
Well I do

x

MORE LOVE, LESS HATE

blogger-for-peace-van-2

BLOGGERS FOR PEACE AND SANITY

THIS DOES NOT REPRESENT ALL DISABLED PEOPLE

THIS DOES NOT REPRESENT ALL DISABLED PEOPLE

Shaun Gibson Twitter: @ShaunyScot
Skype Username: shaunyg1973
Shaun Celtic FC Twitter: @ShaunyCeltic

THE ABOVE IMAGE NEEDS CHANGED TO THIS - THIS REPRESENTS 'BETTER' FOR SOCIETY TO JUDGE

THE ABOVE IMAGE NEEDS CHANGED TO THIS – THIS REPRESENTS ‘BETTER’ FOR SOCIETY TO JUDGE

 

 

 

Dying Inside

After doing this blog here “Suicide is not always a ‘One-off-Act’ – It’s a living thought for People “ I got a few ‘Gossips’ from people who ‘should know better’, but also nothing from people I expect to be at our side, our being ‘Me and mine’ – When someone lives with Suicidal thoughts and a whole host of other issues like M.E. (Myalgic Mencephalomyelitis) + Fibromyalgia + PTSD and Psychosis, like I do, they want to die, I want to die, but I have reasons to live more important than myself, but I would love HELP to take the burden away from loved ones who watch me suffer, we don’t want sympathy or ‘What a shame’ and I hate this I get a lot ‘I feel sorry for you Shaun, you been through too much for someone so young”, yeah that tires your soul out that one. Sadly people I know say things like “That stupid fucking blog that Shaun does” But that’s it, they DON’T HELP THE PEOPLE AROUND ME WHO SUFFER BECAUSE OF MY ILLNESS. This is not about me. Think who hurts when one is watching another die, slowly or fast, it makes no fucking difference. This World is horrible, I am suicidal, but I will MAN UP as people say about me. But it is fucking hard to take the next step, the next breath. 5am, been up for a day and a half, pain is like death, my mind is scrambled and tied to the moon. Yet people who claim to ‘Love me’ are reading SOMETHING ELSE HERE, or wishing they had a voice? #NEWSFLASH, you do have a voice. Use it or shut the fuck up. I am aware there are people FAR WORSE than myself, but this is hard, every moment is ‘How can I kill myself’, but here I am, for now anyway. Regret is ONLY regret AFTER the event ❤ Peace

~~~

♫ Dying Inside ♫
Via Shaun Gibson on You Tube

~~~

MORE LOVE, LESS HATE

blogger-for-peace-van-2

BLOGGERS FOR PEACE AND SANITY

THIS DOES NOT REPRESENT ALL DISABLED PEOPLE

THIS DOES NOT REPRESENT ALL DISABLED PEOPLE

Shaun Gibson Twitter: @ShaunyScot
Skype Username: shaunyg1973
Shaun Celtic FC Twitter: @ShaunyCeltic

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THE ABOVE IMAGE NEEDS CHANGED TO THIS – THIS REPRESENTS ‘BETTER’ FOR SOCIETY TO JUDGE

 

 

 

Who do you ♫ ‘Turn Too’ ♫

In life we can ALL become selfish and think we are all alone, the only one to suffer, it can cause #Anger #Hate and #Fear, this happened to me, maybe it still is, I can never be sure. I transmit my every thought, but often here I am just sharing what I can share with you. Away from the internet ‘I turn’ to many things, music, love, helping, healing and hoping. One day at a time, one moment at a time is all I can do. The thought of ‘What about that event or party in 3 weeks’ is a feeling I just can’t do, so I stopped. I can only live RIGHT NOW. Where I get confused is, why do some make an already hard World, harder for themselves? Denying their own emotions, their own feelings. Never talking to a LIVING SOUL about how they feel, it’s TABOO to talk it seems these days, so people like me don’t fit into what ‘Society Expects’ from a grown man 😀 Pathetic or what? Sadder still I see the denial everywhere, I want to help, to speak, to hug even, but people can’t sometimes and I don’t know why. If we just ‘Say what we need to say’, then our burden is less surely? I have been traumatized so badly I can look ANYONE in the eye and see sadness or happy and all in-between. Who cares, these are just my thoughts at like 5am on a Friday morning unable to sleep and in as much pain as an Elephant giving birth maybe? 😀 I have no idea. This song is sent directly to the Heart I see most, the heart and soul that helps mine. You know who you are honey, thank you for guiding me, thank you for knowing and understanding me. Your strength is a mystery to me, but I just stand in AWE and thank God you choose me, and we ‘Turned to Each other’ – Thank you, ❤ you are my Rock. Why this song? I guess the lyrics, and a slight resemblance of ‘Something’ 🙂 #SameSongTwice #Real & #Lyrical

~~~~

Melanie C – I Turn To You [Lyrics Version]
[VIDEO] Via: raaaaaaww on You Tube

 

~~~~

Melanie C – I Turn To You [Official Version]
[VIDEO] Via: MelanieCVEVO on You Tube

~~~~

MORE LOVE, LESS HATE

blogger-for-peace-van-2

BLOGGERS FOR PEACE AND SANITY

THIS DOES NOT REPRESENT ALL DISABLED PEOPLE

THIS DOES NOT REPRESENT ALL DISABLED PEOPLE

Shaun Gibson Twitter: @ShaunyScot
Skype Username: shaunyg1973
Shaun Celtic FC Twitter: @ShaunyCeltic

THE ABOVE IMAGE NEEDS CHANGED TO THIS - THIS REPRESENTS 'BETTER' FOR SOCIETY TO JUDGE

THE ABOVE IMAGE NEEDS CHANGED TO THIS – THIS REPRESENTS ‘BETTER’ FOR SOCIETY TO JUDGE