♫ Battle Symphony ♫

Another Linkin Park song and this one has lyrics that we will all define in a different way. For me these lyrics are saying “I use Music to battle” whatever that battle is. We ALL have a battle going on, we all find coping mechanisms to help us fight our battles. For me it’s always Music. My family and close friends are a given in terms of ‘They are my first thought” but outside that Music is the saviour of my soul and mind. I find getting lost in a song, the lyrics, the beat; we can own it and play it till it gets stuck in our minds for days and days, even forever. I had one of my sons visit me during the week and his Wife, an amazing woman joked about my son “He plays the same song for days on end” 😀 But this is something my own partner says about me. It is a running joke, just fun that some of us use Music to heal ourselves. Just find the right lyrics or right words and it can make us turn to something else. As I always say, when we lost #Anger #Hate and #Fear, we become something else. But it ain’t easy, to try and lose these 3 emotions is a battle. Being #Anger is easy, being #Hate is easy, being #Fear is Human. Being the opposite of these 3 emotions takes hard work as the basic human instinct is to hate, to be angry and to be fearful. I have been anger, I have been hate and I am often fearful still. But all I can do, same as you, is try. All anyone can do it try, maybe not for ourselves, but we must find reason, even when there is no reason. Again, just my own thoughts.Thought I can have and own from time to time. Written by someone who loves me and helps me every day of her life FOR FREE. I did not promise her this life, but I do what I can.

I worry more for others than myself. We live in a World where GREED has poisoned the souls of the people in charge, and those of you who can read this MIGHT think your life is awful, trust me it could be worse! You could be in Syria, Iraq or worse Yemen where Genocide happens daily with the use of bombs and bullets paid for with money that COULD build hospitals, hire Dr’s, help the poor and in need. I know many people don’t help themselves but FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, some people just get thrown a life and it’s hard. Yet the people I voted for don’t have full control. I am helped and I am thankful, but I look to other Countries and my 1st thought when I am allowed to own a thought is “OH HOW LUCKY WE ARE HERE”, wherever Democracy allegedly exists. Yeah, like Spain? Yeah Democracy right?, right?

My own father tells me always “I cry for humanity” and now I am an adult with kids and a life I did not offer to those around me, I see it too. If only our Politicians were not so scared easy to DO BETTER. Money has ruined us all. A clean slate is needed. In the meantime, find God, find whatever gets you through your hell, even if you don’t think you are in or going to hell. The World will judge YOU anyway and our Future will look at our leaders today and say “WHY DID THEY KILL THIS WORLD” Damn us all for allowing our World to have to BATTLE to breath!! In the very sense of the Word. Our Future will spit in our graves and I don’t blame them 😦


Battle Symphony (Official Lyric Video) – Linkin Park
Via: Linkin Park on YouTube








Shaun Gibson Twitter: @ShaunyScot
Skype Username: shaunyg1973
Shaun Celtic FC Twitter: @ShaunyCeltic






My old friend pain – Poem




My old friend pain


As I sit inside my safe bubble

I know here there won’t be trouble

My mind is full of wreck and rubble

But I am safe inside this bubble


Sometimes I peek outside and ask

Can I come out for just a while

It may make others smile

For now I stay a while


I am here because of a friend

I have known them to long

It has no name like Joan or John

Their name is pain and I want it gone


My old friend pain as we go and live

I carry you as you carry me

You used to be a burden  in my life

Now I fight you with the truth


This truth is you won the fight

Of this I know to be right

With pills inside me I do so rattle

But in time I will win the battle

The Battle




It has been a while since I can say “four days in a row the pain has dulled” and it has. I am still in a fair amount of pain, but since I did the blog on my back, the 4 days after, today “so far” included, I feel as I could go a walk, punch a shark in the lips, clean all my windows, and more. But I know by doing this blog, tomorrow I will wake up in pain again. Or at least I know a bad day is around the bend.

Strange thing is, when I done this blog http://prayingforoneday.wordpress.com/2013/03/08/worst-pain-ever-today/ since then, the pain has dulled by about 25%. When it is 100% like many on here it is hard to deal with isn’t it. And I know many do, I read your blogs

So it comes down to one thing “The Battle” The daily struggle with yourself, my biggest issue is I fight hard, I refuse to accept, and although I have accepted I have Chronic Pain and other things wrong with me, due to Chronic Pain, I still fight it. My body tells me through pain “Nope, you are not doing that” And I go and do it, then suffer for a week. I am my worst enemy to myself sometimes

But what do we do? Do we climb into bed and give in and cry in pain all day feeling sorry for ourselves? No! We get up and fight it, we live, we smile, we be with family, and we do all the things we want to do. Right now I desperately want to go visit my Mum, but I know if I arrange it, come that day, my mind will kick in and the pain will come. They say with Chronic Pain is a mind game of sorts, the mind brings the pain on worse, and maybe they are right (They being the experts who have never felt the pain)

So the battle carries on, between you, your mind and your pain. A daily struggle, each day you open your eyes and wonder what the day will bring, will you be stuck in bed, stuck in a chair, or will you be able to punch a shark in the teeth. This for me is the battle

I know many here fight the same battle. Even with no pain, we all have battles to fight; some here with nothing wrong with them have to battle. The thing I can say about me is I 100% have my mind and I am thankful for this, as I know many don’t. Some days I feel like I could swap pain for mind, if that makes sense, but then I realise it is what it is, pain. Toothache all over my body feeling

But being here I see many battle, I hear them talk about the battle, I read about the battle, I share the battle, and together we can all battle together through love, caring, sharing and God if that is our thing. This may seem odd to some, and if it does, and you believe in God, you won’t turn away in disgust, people who believe in God wouldn’t turn their backs on someone on the path looking for God. Did God turn his back on Peter? No he didn’t, so I know you won’t turn your back on me for not being just there yet, but that is a blog for another time, as I stay on the path of searching with my friend my and teacher, The Heart of Rev. Eddie Tatro That is his blog

So keep battling away, you don’t know what tomorrow will bring. I seen a miracle once when my brother had 3 months to live, this was 20 years or so ago, he is still with us, he fought and lived through what looked like a certain loss, the same as my good friend Ajaytao 2010 on here, he battled the exact same  Cancer as my brother and won, I hope he doesn’t mind me mentioning this

So we battle and hope for the miracle, as they do happen

I am here for everyone and anyone as I hope you all know. I don’t know it all, but I do try, and through the wisdom of many here I am learning more about my condition, life, God and much more with each passing day

In the meantime we just need Patience to see us through