For us Daddys watching our little girls grow up…..

[Parent thing here] HUGE EVENT happening here [Well it is for me] 😦 One of my two Daughters is having a 1st EVER sleep-ever at a friends house 🙂 One moment we are holding a little baby, before you know it, they are going to stay with friends and we also have two sons who are now Parents themselves, THEY GROW UP TOO QUICK! I demand my Daughters stop growing up 😀 But I am selfish if I do this, lol – And me being the Dad I am, I am all worried and concerned 😀 People mock me for this, but it’s who I am, I fear no person, yet small details can hit my heart so hard. Ever since I was like 8 years old, as long as I can remember I been like this, always HATE saying goodbye to people I love, is it a flaw? is it a bad thing? or is it just love? And why is ‘Love’ so Taboo? I think I know what it is, you will feel like all as you do. She stayed with Family many times, but this is her first sleep-over with friends. Some poor woman has about 8 kids sleeping over, all from the same class-room 😀 Good luck to her I say. So she about to go for the night, I can see the house she is going to stay the night in, from my house, ish. Yet still I am getting all upset and worried. But hiding it well for her. She is a wee bag of emotions too. Totally nothing to worry about, let alone write about it on Social Media. But I don’t wear my ‘Heart on my sleeve’. I wear my everything for all to see on my sleeve. I hide NO EMOTIONS, I never have been able to, so I stopped. What I will say is. What would people rather? [A] A big angry bastard of a man/woman, or [B] A man/woman who cares? All parents and all men and woman, what emotion could you live with, what emotions do you hold true to you. WHEN WE THINK “WHAT WILL PEOPLE THINK’, WE ARE NOT OURSELVES, no! we are becoming what society EXPECTS from us. I say feck Society. I got a heart and I use it best I can. I love my Daughters more than a word can explain, and the small things hurt so hard. Crazy thing right? lol – The thing I think people close or near me can’t understand about me is, on 1 side, in the right moment, a bad moment, I will protect what is mine, who I love, with MY LIFE, I am scared of nobody and nothing. Yet flip that old coin over, and like most, if not all parents with kids, be them young or old, WE NEVER LOSE THAT PROTECTIVE FEELING. When they are not in our sight we all act and feel different. If I am anything, I am just frickin real, lol – So tell me Friends. How are people like me judged? I am interested 😀


Tim Mcgraw – My little Girl







Shaun Gibson Twitter: @ShaunyScot
Skype Username: shaunyg1973
Shaun Celtic FC Twitter: @ShaunyCeltic




♪ Second chance ♪

second_chance-posterClosing one door can be hard, but I am learning quicky that for every door that closed, a new one can open, but we must understand 2nd Chances are only there should we see the possibility of the 2nd chance. We all share quotes and images of ‘BETTER’ and ‘EASIER LIFE’ meanings and almost instructions. We share all these things about how we can ‘Make Life Better’, yet how many actually put into practice what they preach or say? My view is not many, we can all share GOOD THINGS all day, but if we don’t apply them then we are sharing for no other reason than sharing a myth to ourselves. Enjoy this song, hope it helps someone


Shinedown – Second Chance ( lyrics )
Via: Dushan Galappaththi on You Tube


Skype: shaunyg1973






This does not represent Disabled people!!

This is how I defined my life. What about you? Please, share away!

19516e1cc11743180a5aaf45339e8d09Today like most days I awaken to the World around me. Taking less Dr’s Medication is almost killing me in terms of pain, but when I was taking huge amounts of Dihydrocodeine. Anatriptaline, Diazepam, Tramadol and Morphine I was living, life was just going too fast, between 4 hours of each medication I was so doped up it was untrue, these days my World has slowed down so much, but in a good way, moments last longer. Today I take 10% of the medication I used to take, 90% gone, and to say I have woken up is an understatement. I was lucky my partner and two sons, friends and some family were as decent as they were for sure. I desire to be a better partner, Dad, son, brother and friend, but on my terms. Someone said a while back “Why did these people stop talking to you” my reply today is “Through my choices” I remembered a World where families spoke to each other, people cared, people spoke, debate happened, a different World. I remember that World where people took effort to come and visit each other, it still happens in my life but only through choices I want to make, around me I see many families so torn it almost upsets me. My sons are 20+ early 20’s and the World they see around them has been their always, their life, a World they were born into. Today as a 42 year old adult I know so many people of my generation lost, alone or sad. Some are in pain, in-fact too many are in pain. But I have to understand because I reached out to understand my pain, amazing people reached back and my circle of choice has become in my control. People in my life, people I give time of day, people I see every day, every week, people I see always are people I want in my life. Nobody walked away from me, my disability made me see a different World, a World where love actually exists; there are no arguments, no sadness and no pain. affirmation-healthI live in pain so what I say above may seem ‘strange’ to the reader but I made my pain me and I it. I allowed my pain to be me, I became the pain and the pain tries to control me. Medicated I lost many people, but if they walked from me what have I lost? 😀 Really is that simple right? I know a World of people in pain, but a World where laughter and happy is. When I say I have no hate nor fear I mean it, not a lot scares me and I say ‘no to hate. If we live in hate, I am certain hate will kill us or we will die in hate only ever knowing hate. I seen so much hate in my life I just said “No more hate” and it worked, I don’t feel hate or fear, I smile through the pain because it’s my only option. Some didn’t believe I was so badly disabled and medicated but I have to say to myself “They had their own thoughts and own lives to life” So this is when I realized ‘choice’ was mine, and life got easier. BTTWI now see my two sons live with their partners and it’s a joy every day watching two young lads who were once my wee boys, the same age as my Daughter’s are now, just wee boys, both loved football and life was football for us all, my two son’s and partner, we did football for 10/11 years together and looking back it was amazing times. Sure I miss that life, but they are in a new life and so am I, with my 3 girls 1021bannerSo now fast forward to today and I am about to have so much amazing times with two little girls, both around 5 years old. I am seeing two babies turn from toddlers into little girls, soon they become young ladies, they will have questions, fears, difficulty understanding life around them. This is where we all step in. Grandparents, Uncles & Aunts and more so my partner and I and their two big brothers and their partners. We, you the reader and I, are by-products of our parents and upbringing, my two sons have happy and I smile as they are happy because my partner and I helped them become the happy they are today, now it’s time to help two wee girls grow into people who can decide and make their own life, because now they are totally dependent on all the people I mentioned above. I don’t know if this is the circle of life or what but I am loving my life these days. Always the pain knocks me down, every day I fall, but every day love picks me up. These days I am helping others to learn to walk in a direction too, but for now it’s knowing my son’s are good and if they need guidance when it comes, we will be here, my partner and I. We never stop being parents. Today as I font out loud in what is often a personal diary to the World to read. Always I am trying to become better, today I am imperfect but I aim to be as near to perfect as I can, but I won’t be perfect, nobody is in the cold realityseven_deadly_sins_by_suchanartist13-d6li7rlMany tell me “Shaun you give away too much on-line” The reality is I give nothing away online. What I am, who I am is for others to decide and define, they will do it regardless and I won’t. I stopped trying to define people, to understand hate is a tool to an unhappy life. All the bad things and good things brought us all too where we are in this moment. If you are smiling reading this, then you made it this far and you will go far. Life is so VERY EASY it is untrue. I don’t have it all figured out but through making every mistake a young lad and now an adult can make, I understand my World more. These were just my 4am thoughts to myself to read in 5 years from now, looking back smiling at reading how I was becoming a part of the World again. Quote 21I must say the journey so far has been amazing and I have so much good and happy to come it is untrue. Often I wish I hadn’t walked away from some family but I look around my World and I see why I did walk away. We have no gossip, hate, shit, crap. Just a disability to understand and medication we can point to and say “Never again”. When I say we, I mean my partner and I.

More love. Less hate

ShaunyGibson Twitter: @ShaunyGibson
Skype Username: shaunyg1973
ShaunyCeltic Twitter:  @ShaunyCeltic

Today’s Disfunctional Family Unit


THIS WILL OPEN A BOX AGAINST THE NSA, PLEASE JUST CLOSE IT, IT’S A WORDPRESS THING. OK! Nobody freak out or hate me here 😀 This is my observations as a blogger, eyes open and as a 42 year old guy coming off strong Dr’s medication after 15 years and noticing the disfunction all around me, family and friends and I will wake up more for sure. At first I thought “Must just be my Family” then I thought “Must be a Scottish thing” So I went on a research binge and seen this is a Global thing. Sure some families do talk, but sadly the majority don’t. Religion for all it’s wrong’s can keep a family talking and functional, this is the only good purpose for Religion I have seen on my hunt for the 2015 answer to what I though was only my problem. Today people talk and say nothing, they walk and end up nowhere. We are almost robots 

Religious does this, not a bad thing

Religious does this, not a bad thing

Something happened to this World that allowed distrust and hatred to be seen in all our lives be it small and almost, just annoying to full on hatred within the family circle. I got a text from a family member over something I wrote about another person in my family, in-fact my whole family, no names and 30 year old images, and it was RAW HATRED. I am the kid in the link below “Beating and Drugs…” I still love this person to bits but they had forgotten that I actually had already spoke to ALL people in whatever the issue was about 2 years ago. I was going to write a book and have it half serious half fiction and this is a part of it here, and it has sat at the bottom of my blog for about a year now, below on the right you will see a Donkey, this is what I wrote in a friend Kim’s site:

t80qwmBEATINGS, DRUGS AND MORE THROUGH THE EYES OF A CHILD < That is my story I told 2 years ago, in a bad way, pain and HEAVILY medicated. Now I have my story so I share it on my page, you the reader are more than welcome to share your opinion here, or my ShaunyNews Facebook group or any other Social Media or even in private. Again, this is true to a point what I wrote. To be honest my Childhood is so cloudy and the medication I was on because of the Disability and M.E I have made me be unable to be truthful to the point I probably would like to have been. I wasn’t the only person in my family to suffer, many suffered, and we don’t talk, I try my best to say “Please, speak to me, I don’t hate you” But people all around the World are to damn unhappy to say “ok, maybe I was wrong” Because I am wrong DAILY and I put my hands in the air and say sorry!


I then started Fibromyalgia and Chronic Pain Issues and it gave me and many others an outlet to talk openly or in private about depression, pain, anything Chronic. It’s a VERY small group and I want to keep it small for people who may be in a bad place to come to and get talked back to. I write to the World, not just Scotland so there are eyes on that page for any person in the World who has issues they are struggling with in a moment like we all do in all our lives.

pain-chain-5-728My Dad always told me “You are the one who always tries to get the Family together” But he knows, sadly why I gave up. I was lucky in the fact I was loved as a kid, I had amazing parents and today they both are helping me get off these pills. My Mum more as she lives not far away, as my Dad lives on an Island somewhere and both are happy with their partners. In my family, same as your family, an event happened, in-fact a few events happened, some brought us close, others split us up, one day a moment will come and bring us back together. I hope this for you too…

Always I say music helps me, just me personally, it changes brain patters and lessens the pain. We all have this outlet from our realities. I am in an amazing life now, people ask me how I can speak like that while being in pain 24/7 but I have my partner and 4 kids to live for. My 2 little princess are my reason for writing this and for trying to smile through a pain they say is worse than Aids, Cancer and other deathly diseases. I must admit I wasn’t too happy to be told this, not something I wanted or needed to know, now I have been told this I often wonder if the placebo effect has taken me 😀 We all have songs for different moods, today as I write this to the World and Scotland and my family, 1 song stands out like a sore thumb, I hope you have a song or an outlet. This song is not your usual Eminem song but today as I sit here happy writing this song makes sense to me. Banner 1 resizePlease find a reason for you to smile again, whoever this is aimed at, just know I can’t and won’t hate anyone, I find it impossible to give my two Daughters a row or raise my voice at them, strange thing for sure. So today with 2 older sons it is almost my partner and I again with 2 young kids as 1 son moved out and another is close to moving out, but this is all good, real good, it means my partner and I did a good job with our sons, they are happy and in love and as a parent this is all we look to do, so here are my partner and I again, with the wisdom of bringing up 2 kids again, only this time we have experience, my partner and I have not brought up little girls before and are still learning to be parents to 2 sons who have their own lives. We all learn, we all adapt, but all I ask is stop the hate and try. I will finish by saying I have been at many a funeral and seen tears of guilt, why we do this to ourselves as a species is beyond me. So do and say today what you would to a person in a way you would saying goodbye for ever. No regrets right? My blog page has EXPLODED and I have over 1.3 Million readers or hits in around a year, this is my new blog, it really is crazy, I am just some dumb Scottish guy


More love, less hate..

Eminem – Mockingbird
Via: EminemVEVO on You Tube


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Moulding kids into adults, life, love, fear, pain, it’s all here.

8d0c3ef0a3c1eebbd5534a063e217f2eOver the last few months writing here and for AceNews about the ALLEGED Sex Scandal involving ALLEGEDLY Top placed politicians in London having sex with kids the same age as my two wee (wee means small in Scotland) girls, it makes me think. I often look at them and think “Should I be telling this story” Then I turn the coin around look at them again and realise why I am telling the ALLEGED sex paedophile story in the UK. I tell it because kids like them are ALLEGEDLY being raped and murdered. Should you want to see these stories use the search to the right and put in key words or click on the coloured text above, you can read the articles. Of course this isn’t all I write about, I go with 3 or stories at a time, that way you enjoy writing and the research better because enjoyment is what the internet is for, we pay for it so we must have fun here, idiots get deleted, I mean idiots who want to argue, people who don’t have debate skills and instead insult because it’s all they can do. Delete, bye 😀  The image to the left is one I am very aware of as day turns to night and back again, every action, every motion, every mood, these little girls will see in me. I must set their standers of what a real man should be, so by the time they feel love and look at boys (Sadly those times arrive) they know very quickly if that boy is just a boy and nowhere near being a man. I must up my game as a partner and roll model, this is something that smacks you in the back of a head when you have 2 little girls 

So back to having 2 wee Princess’s with completely different demands that change by the minute sometimes. They demand, then we as Parents must explain to them, keeping in mind they are 4 and 5 that they should not demand, they must be patient. Yesterday I bought them 2 pink kinder eggs with a toy in the middle of the chocolate in a yellow ball. Well my oldest Daughter wanted a Fairy and she got a pony ink stamp, well it was the end of the World, she wanted a Fairy and it wasn’t to be. I took her aside, she was in tears, I put my arm around her and explained as gently as I could that in life we often don’t get what we want. I used my car as an example, I said “Daddy would like a new car but he can’t get it” I actually can, she is 5 years old, stay with me! She looked up at me and said the most remarkable thing that had me trying not to laugh or cry at her. She said “Well Daddy I will have to wait on the Fairy giver and she might bring a new car” I hid my emotions well and looked at her with a small smile on my face hiding a roar of laughter and replied “Yeah, maybe Shorty we have to wait and see” I call her ‘Shorty’ I have no idea when it started but do it a lot now, crazy yeah 😀 In that moment she gave me a hug, I hugged back and smiled while she wasn’t looking. THAT WAS A MOMENT.

What I am finding are these moments happen 20 times a day, some drama happens then my Partner or I have to stay calm and explain the rights and wrongs. With my partner and I being young parents we have two sons both a few years either side of 20, my parter and are both 40, give or take a year and both in love and happy. One son has flown the nest so to speak, but they are good kids and both my Partner and I are as proud as parents could be, exactly the same as any parent yeah?

My youngest daughter is easier to deal with, she is demanding but gives up very easy, she is content to sit on her tablet watching my little pony with her headset < (It is Scotland, we invented cold wind and rain here, you cant go out) > on and ignore everyone all day. Often I look at her all stretched out on the sofa on her tummy with not a care in the World, what a hard life 4 years old’s have lol. My oldest daughter is a bag of emotions, a proper wee girl. I made a video of her when she was days/weels old, I made a montage song, she loved the song. I hadn’t played it since she was 18 months old of her watching the video I made of her back then, we sat at my PC seat here watching video’s and I showed her aged 18 months watching the video, she looked real confused, she is 5 now, she was looking at herself as a baby with this familiar song (Song below) and she put her face into my shoulder and started to cry, then I tried not to cry, but then I smiled. See at that moment this wee 5 year old girl felt love in her heart and it confused her. All I could do was whisper in her ear “It’s ok to cry honey” then she stopped and went and watched TV or something

This a song a guy would sing to his partner, bit as they both had to stay overnight and I was home with my sons, the song was the first she heard, it felt right
Evergreen by Will Young (with lyrics)

123The privilege of helping two wee lassies (means little girls in Scotland) grow up. Helping these two wee lassies be human and self aware. This is never lost on me, I totally get them, with the boys, their brothers I was just a kid myself, I made up for it before they hit school, but I missed this part, so I am just going with the flow, same as any parent to be able to spend time helping two wee lassies understand love, friends, sharing, caring, responsibility, behaviour, talking better, respect and all that we must teach at this age but tenderly and slowly with a smile and love, one thing is, no matter what happens, it’s a learning curve always and it’s so much fun for my parter, two sons, my Mum and everyone in their life to witness them become self aware, there is not one REAL book on parenting, if there is such a book, it is written by one parent on how they seen and felt having their own kids and watched them grow or some kid out of college trying to be a writer about being a parent, they can’t,  they wouldn’t get near, you have to just figure it our for yourself, be mature and get to grips with the fun that is right there with love and the occasional punch in the eye should you want it, I don’t get parents who can’t just love and leave their questions elsewhere, just love and smile, all us parents have to do really, sadly some can’t and that is sad and unfair, more important the kid just wants love. A wise old man told me not too long ago that “I refuse to not love my kids, I have to be happy and enjoy them as my kids” I just smiled 

It is nearly 8am and I couldn’t sleep, no medication and I am in agony. But these stories in my head like the one I just shared make me realise how lucky I am. The pain is pain, it will do what it will. If you are a parent you should understand every word here, if not, bookmark this for when you become a parent 😀 It is an unreal thing (Thing’ sounds horrid) to witness, it makes you laugh, cry and more, you actually feel your heart hurting and loving, I have felt a broken heart as a parent when one of my sons moved out, I am happy for him but WOW that crap hurts yeah LOL. You know they are fine and safe but feck the hole it leaves in your heart is real, seriously this saying ‘Broken Heart’ actually exists. We are all good now it’s been months. It’s strange you mourn what is gone forever, what you are used to, just life and the normality safe feeling of family certainly takes a dent when one of your kids moves out, I know, I speak for every parent. Well saying that, some parents push their kids out at 16, so I say majority of parents, but we should never take for granted the love and people who we live under the same roof with or who used to, they are your life, your smile, your happy walk, you know the story


My other son works hard also, like his brother he is a gentleman. They both keep their heads down and get on with life and I admire them both for that. As a Dad I can’t be prouder of how they turned out, they will never be anyone’s fool, BUT they know not to go up the road that leads them to fools in the first place, that is the safest way, surround yourself with the proper people and life is easier, and they are doing this, I hope they both understand my partner and I helped mould them to what they are today, or enough to make them good kids. The life skills I got taught and learnt, both street and academic help me, help them. I know how to handle myself 100% now, as a younger guy I hung with people who called themselves friend, in reality they were just hanging on to fear or whatever. Those days are gone, but I know right this second if a man broke in and tried to harm one of my girls I have the composure and skill sets to make sure that man never see’s a house like mine ever again in the way he sees it. I am never angry, if someone broke in I would remain calm. Must be strange for an American  gun owner to read this, but yeah I would keep focus. Having these two wee lassies gives you that focus, as a parent you would die for your kids be them 3 years old or 50 years old, I know this, my Dad tells me several times a month and I see the way my Mum looks at me sometimes, like pride or contentment maybe, knowing I am fine and happy.

I upload a small percentage of my inner World, most would keep locked up but hey, we live once, why pretend, why make it up, why not smile, why gossip, why hate, why anger, you know where I am going. For503135617 many it is sad they can’t feel love or the warmth of family. I hope every day one person finds their happy and stays there for life. Too many people live in fear of love. I will happily open my heart knowing it will get hurt, sadly many close their heart or whatever is closed in-case that same hurt comes their way. This reminds me of a song now I read it back. Enjoy the listen and make today the day you decide to smile 🙂 I just opened my blog and typed as words came to me here, that is the beauty of art, expression can happen at any moment. Reading a writer is like reading a book where you the reader have to understand the writer or someone at a movie watching people work magic to make moments that last. It is all art, I think so anyway. I don’t really care what you call what I am doing now, I just know I enjoy doing it, getting it hard from my mates 😀 And misunderstanding from family is just the way life happens sometimes, often we can figure it out or we cant, that’s just life. Also getting good feedback from amazing people from all 4 corners of our World. Live, enjoy, it really is so simple, as I said, in agony or not, it can be done, harder, but doable. Try it!! You never know, you might surprise yourself one day. And in there is the beauty of all the World’s arts. Thanks for reading

Billy Joel – An Innocent Man (with lyrics)

More love, Less hate… Shaun



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Letting Go – Poem


Started young, I was a father, I was a Kid

I couldn’t be a father, I was still a kid at 21

One 2 the other 1, I had to wake up, I did

I did my best, did the football coaching, became Dad


Now here I am a better man, struggling to breath

Two new girls came along and suffocated me with love

So I have to cut loose. I love always, but you learn now

I will always have your back, your time to fly, go fly


It hurts me to say this, to write this, but I must

Till the day you understand who WE are,  I must

Always I look to you, looking for signs, never they come

So I step away, watching always, but I have to look elsewhere


I write elsewhere, but I have 5 sets of eyes now, always

I have to prioritise where my eyes look, they must look past

Past you, and onto them. Another eye is always, my love not yours

There are no rules for this, no book no guidance, we tried


My only guidance are the eyes looking at me, always

I learn from the eyes watching me, to help you

But until you see this I must let you see the World

Open your eyes, understand the World, understand US


Your back is always in my mind, in my line of sight

This will be the case till the day I die, it is my job

What is your Job? This is your quest now, I have to look away

So we will speak soon, until I know you understand this

I have to set my eyes on things closer to me



My Youngest Son Moves In With His Partner Tomorrow – Hardest day

Ryan and Liza

Ryan and Liza

I don’t really know where to start with this one as it is new to me. I just said goodnight to my two sons, as I said goodnight I realised it was the last time I will say goodnight to my son Ryan in the context of what we are used to as he is moving out tomorrow to live with his partner and daughter in law to me already. I wear my emotions on my sleeve, Ryan, my 20 year old son doesn’t. He was a shy kid, but we can be different, it’s allowed. I sat tonight looking back at all the memories Dawn my Partner, Dean my oldest son, Ryan who is moving out and my two Daughters have created from now going back, I look forward to creating more. I am proud of both my sons. See there is no rule book on ‘Parenting’ There are just emotions, I hope I have given Ryan the emotions to carry him through life. He is a happy kid, he is a lucky kid, best of all, he is my kid x Same as Dean, Courtney and Chloe

In the coming days I will have to explain to two little girls one of the people who they love with no conditions has flew the nest. Chloe is 4 she will ask questions. Courtney is 5, she will notice. See Courtney is like her Daddy, she is a bag of emotions, but this is also allowed. Also their big sister (in-law) Liza will not be here and that will hurt the girls, but that is the nature of life, it is what we do. We raise our kids and hope when this moment arrives they are truly ready, I think Dawn and I have done ok, I think Ryan’s big brother Dean has helped and I know Liza has too

Chloe, Ryan, Dean and Courtney. My reason for being

My Kids – Chloe, Ryan, Dean and Courtney. My reason for being

I know I will be upset, this is a new chapter for my boy. He has an amazing partner, Liza; she is family without the title. She is amazing with her sister’s in law Chloe and Courtney. My Daughters are “Liza Crazy” They love both my son’s partners, Liza and Sam (Deans Partner below). But as I type the tears flow. You know, some of us are blessed in the way we can grab a moment, hold onto it and keep it; I am one of those people. In this moment I am both sad but immensely proud of Ryan and Liza. They work hard, they are friends. My advice to them will be “Keep the friendship” Because when there is friendship relationships, love and caring for one another are easy to achieve, longevity happens and life gets good

Liza & Ryan - Dean & Sam. All in love with a big World awaiting them all

Liza & Ryan – Dean & Sam. All in love with a big World awaiting them all

So to my boy Ryan, we had some moment’s kido, yourself, your Mum, Dean and I over the years with football and more. I just need you to know I will always be your friend 1st and Dad 2nd. I am on the end of a very useful phone, you know this, I have your back till the day I can’t son. You need ANYTHING and it happens. But love we can’t buy, love we can’t make up, love is the universal language for us all.

I PRAY...Ryan and Dean, brothers and friends stay as close as they are. So often siblings drift apart. Guys, we only have each other

I PRAY…Ryan and Dean, brothers and friends stay as close as they are. So often siblings drift apart. Guys, we only have each other

Ryan, I speak for your Mum and I, we wish you well. I ask you visit your Mum as much as you can. The girls will want to come and stay with you and Liza a lot so be prepared buddy. I just need you to know I am more than proud of you Ryan. The young man you have become has filled me with so much pride. Like Dean I tell you both “I love you” most nights at bed time. Two small words and a letter but the mean so much “I love you” Be good, be brave but most of all be yourself and love Liza like she needs loved and treat a woman how she deserves to be treated. I know you will do this, I brought you both up to respect woman. Liza, if you read this, please look after my boy hon…

I will wrap it there as I can’t see the screen for tears. The house will be emptier, but our hearts fuller. Distance creates more love, you will see son..

Your mate

You’re Dad


This image was when Courtney was born, my oldest Daughter. Dawn couldn’t come to Ryan’s football game that day, his Mum said “Go and win the league for your little Sister” We had to win this game to win the league. So when I look for ‘Moments’ This is one right here. I may have dream’t it but I am sure he pointed to the sky when he scored his 2nd goal. We won 3-0 and Ryan scored 2. He did it for his little Sister and a Mother who had never missed a game before. Now that is a moment right there, we capture them, we hold them, we keep them

Ryan aged 14 scoring the goal that won the team I managed and him and his mates played in, the league

Ryan aged 14 scoring the goal that won the team I managed and him and his mates played in, the league

My Daughter Starts School Tomorrow. An Honor in Bringing Kids up


12345My little princess’s growing up and Daddy isn’t liking it. In a Country where showing or speaking of these feelings, being a man, can be tricky as people mock you 😀 I am different, I pride myself on not being “Normal” I decided a LONG time ago I was going to live my life the way I wanted and not how Society says we must. I was a Dad very young to two amazing young men (20/22 now they are), I was 17 then 19 a kid myself! My partner and I decided 7 years ago now to try for a kid. We went through some hurtful moments, but we got there. I watched as my Partner started to show signs a small person was inside her. I would lay and talk to her tummy and I think when the girls were born they knew my voice. The amazing (Probably not for a woman at times) time of being there to see your kid born is such an amazing thing. A little person appears, a little girl, Courtney we called her, and she changed our lives for the better. 18 Months later her little sister was Born, Chloe. Deep down I wanted a little girl, when my oldest Daughter was born it was utter joy, tears, hard tears of love and joy

Now 7 years on my oldest Daughter starts School tomorrow. We have got all her clothing and Schoolbag, lunchbox, pencil case, you name it, it’s there. Both my Partner and my own parents have been amazing in helping buy things. A team effort it was, lol. Tomorrow I don’t think I will cry, I will be proud though. Chloe starts 2nd year Nursery/Pre-School, Courtney goes to REAL School. Before Courtney went to bed we had a little chat on our own, a proper chat with this little bundle of emotions and love. She asked me “Daddy, is School fun” I said “Honey, school is amazing” She gave me a hug, a kiss “I love you lots Daddy” then went to back to bed. My heart broke. Not for bad reasons, but for a mixture of reasons. To have the privilege of having two baby girls and watch them grow up to be Sisters, friends, enemies, all love has been so far indescribable, I honestly can’t find a Word, it’s a feeling stronger than love and I don’t think there is a word for this feeling.

The pleasure and joy of watching two babies grow to throw pieces of Jigsaw at each other, cuddle and make up, play together, watch TV together, sit at a PC or Laptop together, watch silhouette-family-with-eclipse (1)them having fun out the back garden, has been a trip, a good one. Daddy want’s time to slow down. But we can’t be selfish, we must let go. With my two Sons, they are both at home “Just” There is talk of them moving out, and I am thinking “Spare room for an office, YES!” I am of course half joking. They are two gentlemen, We taught them life the best we could and still do, you never stop being a parent, my Mum told me that once. They are soon to fly the nest, I will cry but I know they are ready to take on the World.  The moments I had with my sons when they were little boys then teenagers was brilliant, all we did was Football. When I was manager, they were there supporting, when one was playing we were all, my Partner included, there to watch.

Now it’s time to do it all over again, teach 2 little bags of emotion and love how the World works. As parents do we give advice when we know they need it. There is no book on parenting and if someone wrote it, it would be useless. You parent with love but also instinct, you do it with unconditional love, to see that love given back, or to feel that love given back 4 times makes it all worthwhile.

So tomorrow another chapter of our lives takes another direction. We are ready for it, we will enjoy it and hold every moment as long as we can. Life is so fragile, we sadly have seen it the last few days with the death of Robin Williams and all the death and murder add genocide, we understand we MUST live in moments. We let yesterday go but never forget and we plant seeds for tomorrow, and in THIS moment we are smiling and happy, then life is amazing. I suffer badly with pain every day but all I have written has helped. A disability can easily destroy a relationship and the dynamics of a house. I have known my Partner since I was 12, we were best friends then we are best friends now. I hate sometimes when the pain is so hard to take I vent, but everyone in my home understands it’s not at them, I never do in-front of the girls, I just can’t, wouldn’t, would be unable to, even if I needed to. My oldest Courtney has picked up Daddy is 100% healthy and hurts, I tell her “Daddy has a sore knee from playing football” She is noticing things. For now, that is the story, she and her sister Chloe will know when the time is right, But in the meantime I will pray the Fibro will leave my body. I want to be as healthy looking as I can when I am out with them and take them to the school grounds, so I demand it of myself to take the pain, nothing is impossible if our heart truly desires it be




The bond between Parents and Kids, through music

Thanks to my friend The Heart of Rev. Eddie Tatro


Tim McGraw

The man above is a good friend of mine. Not the lad in the picture, Eddie Tatro

He did a blog, with his reasons, and added a video by Tim McGraw, My Little Girl. Being from Scotland I had never heard of Tim McGraw, but now I have listened to more of his music, and will watch the film Flicka as soon as a I can

This song inspired and touched me. I have two Daughters, and like many (all?) Dads with Daughters there is a special bond. I think any father reading this will know. The song below just hit a nerve with me, and I just love it. I play it often, and I sit with a Daughter on each knee, and they sing it with me the best they can. My older Daughter who is 3, nearly 4 can sing the odd word. It is something to sit with your small daughters and sing with them. My oldest Daughter can sing “Set Fire to the Rain” by Adele as well as “Someone like you” And she is getting better. 🙂

So, this is the song, and I would like to thank Eddie for introducing me to a song I know I will still have a connection with my Daughters in years to come. Thank you mate

Also to any Dad with a Daughter, you know where I am coming from. And Mums also. I  feel guilty now for just saying Dads, lol

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